by Anna-Maybrit Lambert
On Sunday the 27th of February, I went to satsang with Mihai Stoian.
I had been in Concordia, Natha's Yoga Center in Copenhagen, for some days, doing karma yoga, learning, teaching, learning more, and relaxing. I had planned to stay for the satsang, but had an appointment in Odense, my home town, Monday, so didn't quite know if I should go home or stay. As the afternoon went by, I wanted more and more to leave for home, so I could catch up with sleeping and yoga at home – and I packed my bag and threw my bed linnen in the laundry basket, and prepared for leaving.
But when I went down the stairs, I felt troubled – I felt I wanted to be alone, but also that I wanted to stay... so I decided to be attentive for signs. And then I got a text message if I would like to stay for a talk with one of the teachers/a friend of mine.
Well, that decided it... I sat with my bag and waited to talk to him, and then for the satsang. But I was really really tired and just wanted to lay on my bed at home.
At 18.00 the satsang started – and Mihai introduced the subject: how an individual can change the world... and the contradiction between the seemingly freedom of the individual and living in a society.
I cannot and will not in any way try to give an impression of all the subjects that the satsang touched. I could mention the whole idea that one person is able to change the world by transforming herself or himself in a way, that can spread an impulse and change the surroundings, like a very small portion of the right culture can turn milk into yogurt.
I could mention the idea that we are all in the middle of it All, and how he explained that space and time are illusions that we sustain by the conditions, we create for ourselves by depending on and identifying with our minds.
I could mention that he talked about how we run away from who we truly are – and that whenever we try to explain, apologize, understand, relate to, analyze who we really Are – then we are not the kings and queens that we are created to be – then we are just people admiring the king, but always avoiding to take our rightful place.
I could mention this wonderful image, he used, that we should see it like we were standing on a shore, looking towards the sunset, and seeing a stripe of golden light coming towards us, and knowing that our neighbour on the shore sees the exact same thing – and that from God's perspective, the whole ocean is gold... and the shore... and the people standing there... and that there is no differences between any of the mentioned.
But what moved me the most was this feeling of love in the satsang.
From my little corner, my limited understanding, I just felt so alive, so full of love, so blessed during the satsang – like my soul understood all these things like you would understand your Mother's tongue, even if you had become deaf.
I felt no need to be able to understand all this with my mind, or to be able to remember it all, or just to catch it all with my ears. I just liked being.
And being there.
I felt so strongly that there was no 'here', 'there' and 'overthere' – there is only, and can only ever be, here. And that I create the rest as I go along.
Mihai mentioned one thing, an analogy that really stayed with my mind afterwards: that some computergames centered around the user perspective have this very clear set up where you can see that you are not moving, but moving the universe around you instead when you push the buttons and turn the joystick. And in the game, you can easily perceive this, because you can see the frame of the screen and also the corners of the computer reality or cyberworld. But in 'real life', we cannot perceive these borders, and therefore we believe in time and space as our borders and frame.
While we are in fact just Here. Not moving. But projecting our Here and Now moment for moment so it makes 'sense' for our minds – which we have come to love so dearly as if they were the kings, while they are only the servants.
Just Here. Just Now.
Well, while Mihai was talking about this, I was sitting planning the whole week coming up, and was reluctant to listen – I mean, i could always listen another time, or after I had done my planning.
But the words about just one Here and just one Now made me look around in the room, and I felt so filled with love and gratitude that I put my calendar away. I was amazed with my inner shift of perspective, and even checked with my most painful area in my psyche – how I felt about that at that moment... right Here.
And I felt good.... not fatalistic, but trustful, optimistic and with a feeling that I was the Queen of this creation... of my own Here and Now. I felt relaxed... and I even relaxed with feeling this.
So... I cannot make a transcription of everything Mihai said, or explain it all to you in everyday terms, and I cannot say that I understood all, but now have forgotten.
I can only say that after the satsang I felt blessed, and that all was well. And that I felt that I witnessed that all was well - Here and Now.