An essential condition for the couple relationship is to learn to transfigure. In this way, we remove the problem that many complain about – that they do not find somebody to love. When we learn to transfigure, we learn to look with our soul. Then, the only “problem” will be time.
We carry beauty with us, but we must learn to manifest it through transfiguration. If we do not learn this art, we usually end up being surrounded by people we cannot love. If we are in such a situation, a way out is to learn to transfigure.
For this, we must become active in this state of love and to learn to search for love actively – to actively open ourselves to divine love. Thus we can learn to attract God’s love within ourselves in the same way we learn about any other aspects from God. Love is not something achieved at will. We just have to open ourselves to it and let it carry us, without opposing resistance. But we become that which we truly love. Therefore, if we still love inferior states, if we are still carried away by strange states of consciousness, if we love to be unhappy, we will face situations and relationships in which we will be unhappy. In this way we become that which we love. If we heal our love from any unhealthy aspects, if we orient love towards everything that is sublime, divine, then such phenomena do not appear anymore. Then we will indeed face relationships in which we are happy.
The greatest hunger of the modern world is the hunger for love. Yet, few are those who are willing to love. That is why the one who loves, who manifests love actively, becomes a magnet that attracts those around him, because he offers or radiates infinite love, which all the others desire more or less consciously. Therefore, first of all we have to open up to love and then to attract the lover we wait for – this will become a priceless divine gift, magnetically attracted by the love we constantly radiate.
Please, examine your consciousness and realize how much you want to love and how much you want to be loved by somebody. You may think: “Of course I am open to love.”, which in terms of Ego means “Of course I am open to somebody falling crazily in love with me, to do everything I want, to spoil me, to take care of me, to protect me.” But the idea is: “Of course I am open to another person, to love her, to spoil her, to put her on a pedestal, to worship her, to transfigure her, to see the divine manifesting in her.” There is a confusion between these two perspectives, and in a strange way this confusion pushes away from us every being.
There are beings who passively wait to be loved. This does not awaken the resonance of attraction, but it unconsciously awakens hunger. People that come near such a woman feel from her a kind of devouring hunger: “If I catch you closer, I will swallow you!” This produces rejection. It is like a need to be loved and, moreover, as the responsibility of the other one: “Now, you have to love me, since we are in a couple relationship.” In fact, the idea is: “Now I have to love you and to increase this love and to open my soul even more towards this love.” Aim to maintain the awareness of how much you want to be loved and how much you want to love. The love we give is what creates the attraction, and the more we love actively, the more this will radiate like the sun, and everyone loves the sun. The more we stay in the passive state of being open, but we are open towards the idea that we would like to be loved, what we actually radiate in the outside is a state of devouring hunger, which will be perceived as fear, and no one will want to come close to such a person.
Taken from "The spiritual couple relationship", conference kept by Mihai and Adina Stoian in 2006, in Costinesti - Romania.
Published by Natha.net